Looking for each other we play a never ending game.
We constantly feel the need to change each other and miss the goal for which we started the game. Relations between the sexes are a delicate balance in which we must allow each other to be as they are while each of us knows his place and role in the game called intimate relations.
The game of intimate relationships begins and rests on mutual trust, which of course must begin with trust between human beings and not between the man and the woman.
The man and the woman are forms of embodiment when beneath this form is a deep, formless essence that can be called our โsoulโ or “consciousness.” When you close your eyes, are with someone you love, and breathe together, the shape has no meaning. Love is a deep inner feeling completely devoid of form, and it exists beyond man and woman, beyond male and female, and this loving connection is what we all long to reach. Everyone is trying to fulfill love in their own way, but we have lost the connection to our essence, and currently we believe in the form.
The fall from quality to the form
Looking for a partner can seem like going shopping in the supermarket and judging a product by its look and taste. And if we are looking for relationships on dating sites, we must first fill out a form and indicate what the other person looks like, their height, their hobbies, and we sometimes check how many followers they have on Instagram.
And although it is clear and logical that we would like to find someone who suits us, the chance that this will start a relationship will remain small, as the statistics of the percentage of searchers compared to the percentage of finders will attest.
And if you ask those who searched and indeed found relationships, you will find that for a little while they put aside the form they filled out on the website and connected with another person on another level that is not mental.
The problem with looking for relationships online
A meeting between people contains several types of communication that involve the mind and all the systems of our body. The most important part of communication with members of the opposite sexes is our body language and physical senses, which involve our intuition and convey most of the information that connects us with the other person or distances us from them.
Our mind is an important part of the intimate encounter, but pretty soon the truth will be revealed that it is not going to play a major role in the intimate courtship game.
What happens there between the man and the woman is an age-old communication that is so complex that there is still no human mind on earth that can understand it in depth and intervene at the level of this communication that comes from the essential part of human beings.
The balance between mind and emotion
Iโm about to tell you something that I want you to listen to:
An intimate relationship that begins by filling out an online form is a relationship between the person and the computer and not a relationship with the opposite sex.
Even if you find yourself chatting with a member of the opposite sex, it does not mean that there is really a relationship with another person, but only potential that has not yet been fulfilled and may never become a reality.
The phone call will give you another dimension by allowing you to hear his/her voice, but it will still be a small part of what is going to happen once you meet face to face in real life.
This moment of a chat or a phone call with someone who meets the criteria of the form we filled out online is the biggest illusion moment of relationships that have not yet started, and it is this moment that holds the most disappointment and casts the most doubt on ourselves.
I recommend that we all tell ourselves the truth at this moment and make it clear to us that the potential that exists for a relationship at this moment is only in our heads, and this is our way to have hope and calm the fear that we will be left alone.
An intimate connection cannot rely on the intellect alone, but must rely on a substantial and energetic connection between us. It is about a connection that comes from the essence of us, and only this connection can be the thing that will keep us together in the next stage we are going to.
Of course itโs important to filter out what we donโt want, but letโs stop for a moment and ask ourselves, What is important to me in a relationship in terms of values?
What is the leading value of my intimate relationships?
Because if we go down to the depths of the connection between us, we will surely find that the most important thing for us is first of all to be truly together with another person. A basic human connection between humans
And if we discovered
That physical togetherness and a mental and emotional connection are what is really most important for us to find, then our pursuit in life should be after what we really want most and not after the form of things, which is only the cover for the essence but never the thing itself.
Author: Ilan Aviv
Leave A Comment